Praise The Lord

Last night I had a dream.

I had an ongoing quotation going through my head based on some sort of schoolboy-ish religion (isn't it all?).O It was something biblical like "and by my name will know me, for I am the Lord". Over and over in my head this fell, so much that it contributed to disturbing my sleep.

I know why it happened because I watched quite a scary episode of Doctor Who earlier on in the evening and there's not much room behind my sofa.

The Doctor is now an old man who is afraid of the dark. Just like me.

There was only one way this could play out.

It even made me linger later on in the day when I bumped into the God-fearing/praising free satellite channels in the high 600s full of horrendous all-American so-called pastors begging for money and exploiting poor communities with supposedly learned teachings.

If only they could step back and realise that what they are preaching makes no sense at all.

They talk of "walking in God's spirit", "allowing the holy spirit to enter you". 

I recognise these as individual words because I have come across them in other contexts but they have not been used in an order that makes coherent sense. That is the basic rule of communication. It is utter claptrap. And they can't see it.

They are blind. Blinded by greed for profit or status. At least I hope so, because if not, then it is a pure window of stupidity that prevents them from keeping schtum about their delusions.  The beautiful plasticity of the human brain twists and tones their message and then preaches to the vulnerable, spreading delusions otherwise worthy of being defined as mental illness. Incapacity is contagious.

They spend so many years twisting these ancient words into vantage points. Selecting, defying, culling, perverting and twisting what is an already unsound source material. Choosing the translation they want to purvey and then spouting this out. 

Spouting is a better word than preaching. I used preaching earlier correctly in a negative and judgemental sense but I am concerned that that didn't come across. I wasn't meaning to give them credit as teachers.

Their blinkers are well and truly on. They have no business claiming to be teachers. 

And they don't talk about truth. They wouldn't recognise truth if it punched them in the throat.

I think I misremembered my schoolboy quote  "And by my name will you know me, for I am the Lord". In fact I think I made it up.

But why not? The Bible so regularly misquotes itself that we should all join in. 

So let's see... the quote in my dream possibly had a bit of Pulp Fiction thrown in "And you will know I am the Lord when I make my vengeance upon you". [Samuel L Jackson quoting Ezekiel 25:17].

My memory of it is a little softer. I was just thinking that God was giving himself a name check.

But I do find some of the translations of Isaiah 52:6 (which seems to relate to my misquote) pretty comical.

From the New American Standard Bible 

"Therefore My people shall know My name; therefore in that day I am the one who is speaking, 'Here I am'."

Good for you mate!

Alternative endings include "Surely I am He who is speaking, behold Me", or "I am he that does speak: behold, it is I".

Now I rather like that as an opening gambit when walking into any room. Instead of muttering a casual hello, extend the arms and say, "Behold, it is I...."

It even has an echo of a 'Allo 'Allo with an elderly character constantly pausing, looking around and and adding ".... LeClerc"

I'm God, he seems to be saying.

Everybody knows my name.

But this is heaven, isn't it?

Not Cheers.