My Future

I went to see a psychic today.
I went for a reading.
I know what you're thinking.
Why did you do that? That doesn't sound like your kind of thing.

The easy answer to that question is I just thought I would. They are
popular. it was cheap on a Wowcher. And even though I know how cold
reading works I wanted to see and feel it first hand from a pro.

There's two sides to every story and she was the expert.
She considered herself to be a "natural medium" which she implied was
one that was self-taught. I was determined to be a polite,
well-behaved guest, so well-behaved that I even chastised myself for
thinking the obvious gag of "she looked more like a large".
I was in her domain and I wanted to see somebody in action as it were.
So you might say, mild curiosity.
She didn't require the benefit of my doubts because I knew how the
process worked.
But I was not interested in rubbing her nose in it. I was there for
the experience.
I wasn't doing an exposé for the local paper.
She wasn't earning very much money from the coupon and I wasn't going
to give her grief.
I was hoping simply to have an enjoyable experience delivered by an
expert with a good heart.

Simply put. The real reason I went is that I wanted her to do well.
And for my part I hoped to brighten her morning a little. Maybe we
could work together in the future on a scam or something.

I wanted to her be nice and welcoming. She wasn't particularly. She
never told me her name. She wasn't interested in mine.

She made me sign a disclaimer. Of course I used the false name I
provided her with so that she could not research me on Facebook. The
disclaimer said that the service she provided was for entertainment
purposes only. Great.
I was ready to be entertained.
By an expert.
On their terms.

I had had one previous spiritual paid encounter 20 years previously
with a pretty useless palm reader in a Romany caravan at the local
fair. And inadvertently I had kind of fallen out with her, even though
I had just given her money.
I managed to do this simply by asking on which part of my palm she was
seeing a certain prediction.
It turns out this is unacceptable behaviour.
You see this is not interactive entertainment. It is entirely one-way.
After disturbing her script, she made it clear to me that my
interruption was not welcome. Of course I never got an answer.

Anyway that was 20 years ago and I trusted that things have changed.

I arrived in a run-down part of the north-east on, it has to be said,
a gloriously beautiful day.
I was visiting a shop on a street called High Street. I tell you this
because this was the main street in the area. We all know what a High
Street is, don't we boys and girls?

But this is the north-east in a period of depression. Almost every
shop was closed. Even the betting shops. I've never seen a street so
closed.
Her psychic shop was one of the few that were open. Perhaps it was
open just for me. I don't know.

Don't get me wrong. I'm not saying she was doing a roaring trade.
When the betting shops go out of business, there isn't much left to play with.
And I admired what she was doing. She was running her own business.
She was trying to make a living.
She was a small businesswoman. Well, she was a medium. But as I say I
was on my best behaviour and certainly not making jokes like that.

As I waited, I looked around her waiting room. You can imagine the
sort of ephemera, a pot shire horse, an Aquarius mug, a pencil drawing
of Alan Shearer, nd a huge sign on the wall saying Live Laugh Love.
I was optimistic.
But that wouldn't save me.

I'll tell you the rest... tomorrow