Thursday, 12 December 2013

Power to the People

I have telekinetic powers.
There I've said it.
It behooves the domestic superhero to keep his, or her (what, really?) secret strictly, well secret.
(I've been waiting for years to include the word 'behooves' be in this blog. This is a good day!)
But I do have telekinetic powers. Oops, there I go again.

Specifically, there are certain materials I only need to look at and they dissolve.
Patrick Stewart would approve.
I don't know what you call a sort of power like mine  - a sort of mind control over plastics.
But to activate the mysterious force, I hold the plastics just by the fingertips at the edges in order to deliver my mind control - not in a way that could conceivably cause any damage.

In fact, you could try and see if you have a secret power too by trying this experiment at home. The tools you will need to try to duplicate the effect are as follows.
1. Buy your bin bags at B&M Home Stores, and
2. Then through a complicated series of..... Oh no, actually that's it. Just buy the bin bags and we will begin.

Hold the bin bags with your featheriest touch, and stare at the middle of the bin bag, (which should supposedly hold 50L of domestic rubbish).Watch as it effortlessly rips from top to bottom. Congratulations! Welcome to the club! Don't forget to send in your subs!

For gods sake, don't waste your ability.
Don't throw it away.
Admittedly, I've yet to discover a useful outlet for my powers.
Until I do, I'm getting my binbags at Aldi.

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